Living Minimally With Our Stuff - Pt. 1
Holding on to only what truly matters in our lives
This is week 1 of 4 in which I’m diving deep into our minimalistic lifestyle and how it has opened up the holy space of decluttering my home, heart, and mind. I would love to hear your thoughts and journey together as I invite you a little closer to something that has been so life-giving to my family. I pray it’s a blessing to you.
I remember the day we started minimizing with our kids. We had three boys and a baby girl within our home at the time. We had been back in the States for a little over a year and had accumulated quite a bit of stuff. We all sat cross-legged on a bedroom floor for a few minutes talking about what we were doing as a family, and then we made it fun.
We dumped every single toy, book, stuffed animal, lego creation, collected fossil, random item that they owned onto the floor in their rooms. Every. Single. Thing.
I remember looking at their eyes as they gazed in amazement at all their things in one pile—it was so much.
It was fun at first, to laugh at all these things they owned and to go through them one by one. We pulled out toys they hadn’t played with in years, laughing as we remembered chunky baby fingers flinging it across the room.
Then, two hours later, it wasn’t as fun. It was overwhelming, defeating, and full of decision fatigue for all of us.
“Man, we have so much stuff!" we’d say to each other in amazement and tiredness.
So. Much. Stuff.
We stayed committed though.
Day by day, as we continued to slowly go through toys, clothes, pots and pans, makeup, shoes, and the junk in the garage—our hearts started to feel a little lighter. We were able to breathe a little better and the kids had much more space to run around and wrestle.
The more we got rid of stuff, the more we realized how weighed down we felt by it all.
How much of a hold does the stuff we own have on us?
How in the world do we come to own so many things?
I asked that question as I piled each article of clothing I owned on top of my bed, not realizing how many pieces were shoved into the back crevices of the closet.
I asked that question when I pulled things out of the garage I didn’t even know existed.
I asked that question when I went looked at the decor covering my walls.
I asked that question when I opened the shoe closet and piles of pairs fell out.
There are a LOT of answers to that question and they all will look different for different people. We all come to own stuff through various ways. Most of the time, though, we buy it. We live in a fast-paced, consumer-centric society. We are lured by the latest trend on TikTok, the add on the commercial break, and the recommended item we never knew we needed but when we saw it, we knew we needed it.
When we buy things it makes big industries a lot of money.
In the U.S. alone, retail sales hit $7.26 trillion in 2024.1
Advertising spending is projected to hit (again in the U.S. alone) over $450 billion by the end of 2025.2
Holy cow.
Just let those statistics sink in for a moment, and I’d also encourage you to research your own. We are a consumer-driven society—always needing one more thing to fill our lives with. But alas, there is not enough time or space here to discuss the ways in which we all accrue stuff in our lives.
What are we doing within our homes and souls to get rid of the things that no longer need to hold space there?
We tend to hold onto things in our lives because of the memories they’re attached to, or expectations we think others have of us and the way our lives should look.
What would it look like for you, dear reader, to actually begin making space in your life and not just talking about it and saying you don’t have time?
I’m not just talking about a room in your home, but also a room in your heart—the places that feel so cluttered and full, you’ve lost sight of who you truly are. Or have you ever met who that is?
It is possible.
We can begin together.
Right here, today.
Let’s begin.
1. Chose one small space to begin.
We will often get a little too far ahead of ourselves in life with big, grandiose ideas of change—to then fall flat on our faces in defeat. That is why most New Year’s resolutions typically don’t last. After the fanfare, the Instagram post made, the Yoga mat bought, the class signed up for, the book purchased—we actually have to decide if we’re going to show up in our lives, and decide to make a change.
That is a brave choice to make.
It’s an even braver choice to stick to.
For me, it has been a hard tension and intentional practice over the years to start small and to move slowly. Not everything needs to be done today. There are times where a quick decision and action are needed in life—most of the time it’s forced and unnecessary.
So, dear reader, let’s choose one area of your life and home to look at—it may be your closet, under your bathroom sink, your laundry room shelf, your shoe collection, your bad attitude, the anxiety you feel when a word is said, the tightness in your chest at a memory—you get to name where you start and how you begin.
2. Hold each item up to the Light.
Take everything out of this space you have chosen. Bring every single thing out from the darkness of where it’s lived for so long and hold it up to Light.
It will feel very uncomfortable at first.
Don’t let that bowl your aunt gave you thirty years ago get pushed back even more, take everything out of the place you’ve chosen. Lay it all out in front of you and notice it.
If these are household items, make piles that you immediately can do without to donate, a pile to keep, and a pile to go through later. Maybe you put that “later” pile in a box in the garage for a few months. If you need something, take it out. I can almost guarantee you that most of it you won’t need and you can feel the freedom to donate it after a few months.
If this is an internal room of your life that you’re sitting with, kindly make space for what you need to pull out and look at. Let the fears rise. Let the peace wash over you. Let the words that you’re scared to speak come out.
Hold each thing up to Light—for Light shines in the darkness and the darkness cannot stop the beams of Light.3 Things that have lived in darkness for so long need time to be bathed in the goodness of Light. Hold kindness as they adjust to being in the Light.
Ask the Trinity what they would have you do with what you’re noticing and holding. Maybe you thank this part of yourself for protecting you for so long, but its time to be let go. Maybe the pieces of who you are need to be dusted off and displayed for all to see.
You get to choose.
3. An ongoing process.
Practically speaking, for years I’ve had people walk into my home asking how we kept it so clean. I NEVER want to seem like we’re putting on a “squeaky clean” front to anyone that comes over. We just developed a system and rhythm of tidying and have stuck to it. Minimizing your heart and home isn’t just one sweeping action where you can wipe your hands clean of it forever.
It takes great intentionality to notice what needs to continue holding space in our lives, and what we need to welcome in and make room for.
“One in, one out” I would reply. That’s how we keep our clutter at a minimum.
Practically speaking, that was true. As adults and what we practiced with our children as well, we would consider anything we were purchasing and ask ourselves, “Is this item I want to buy worth it to me enough to trade something else out to make space for it?”4 Sometimes it was. Sometimes it wasn’t. But it was the heart behind it of—we don’t just consume, we intentionally use.
So if I buy a shirt, I get rid of a shirt. If my kids buy a toy with their money, they trade a different one they don’t play with out—we let them choose what they trade out. It certainly isn’t always what I would choose to get rid of, but the discipline of considering our purchases is being learned.
Same concept with what we are letting into our hearts. We are in a time in history where we can consume more information that we’ve ever had access to. That is not healthy for our brains much less our hearts.
What are you letting in that’s taking space in your heart?
Is it important enough for you to keep it there?
If so, can anything else go to provide more breathing room?
It’s always a process. It takes intentionality. It takes consistency.
Life is a journey. Let’s be kind to ourselves as we walk the path of life with all that we hold.
May we hold compassion for ourselves as we begin to minimize the spaces of our homes and heart that have felt too full.
May we notice what Light shimmers in our hearts as we vulnerably hold our tender pieces out to Him.
May we remember we are tenderly held close by the Trinity in all we journey.
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https://capitaloneshopping.com/research/retail-statistics/
https://www.statista.com/outlook/amo/advertising/united-states
This is in reference to John 1:5
We do not do this with birthdays and Christmas though! We just make sure before the holiday they have enough room for anything they receive to have a home.
Love your questions here, and I'll be spending some time reflecting on them!
This really flows with something I wrote in my recent newsletter. God is up to something! And I think I have work to do!